From Torch Song Trilogy

[ssurgul]

"I have taught myself to sew, cook, fix plumbing, build furniture. I can even pat myself on the back when necessary. All so I don't have to ask anyone for anything. There's nothing I need from anyone except for love and respect. And anyone that can't give me those two things has no place in my life. You're my mother. I love you. I do. But .... If you can't respect me, you've got no business being here."

It's harsh, but it's a good building block for just about anyone, not just us 'fairies'.