*smirks a bit*
2008-May-17, Saturday 10:34 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
ssurgulWell, isn't that fun.
A quote from "Woof! Perspectives into the Erotic Care & Training of the Human Dog" which quoted Jay Wiseman's "SM 101":
I'm so strongly reminded of a conversation I had with one of Fuckhead's friends, while we were together. This friend had decided that I was a completely irresponsible Master because I had 'humiliated' the slave, by referring to him in the pet name assigned, 'Little girl'. Well this friend didn't like it, decided that it was totally humiliating, and was only too happy to be vocal about how irresponsible I was at the time, simply because he didn't like the situation himself. On talking with Fuckhead about it, he said specifically that he was honestly confused why that was the case as he didn't consider it humiliating in the slightest. It's what he was, he knew that (at the time) I loved him and that the name was one of a certain intimacy.
The lesson? That the bulk of furries really have zero clue what legitimate BDSM is. Which is why so many of them never make it in the non-furry BDSM community. And why they're so mocked in general, from BDSM'ers. When you don't get something, and you try and ascribe a false belief to it, and then reinforce your mis-belief with lies, gossip and childish behavior it doesn't show you're mature, strong, or right. Further, it will certainly be great to hear final confirmation that by now, Fuckhead's views have gone 180 degrees and now he's almost certain to be holding me accountable to 'humiliating' him nonconsentually with such terms, simply because all his 'friends' have ego-stroked him into believing that what he said wasn't what he said, and what 'really' happened was what they want to have happened rather than any sort of reality.
A quote from "Woof! Perspectives into the Erotic Care & Training of the Human Dog" which quoted Jay Wiseman's "SM 101":
What does it mean to humiliate somebody? Basically, it means to reduce them in status, usually in an embarrassing or mortifying way. Key point: Humiliation is mainly a state of mind. For an experience to be humiliating, a slave must consider it humiliating.
I'm so strongly reminded of a conversation I had with one of Fuckhead's friends, while we were together. This friend had decided that I was a completely irresponsible Master because I had 'humiliated' the slave, by referring to him in the pet name assigned, 'Little girl'. Well this friend didn't like it, decided that it was totally humiliating, and was only too happy to be vocal about how irresponsible I was at the time, simply because he didn't like the situation himself. On talking with Fuckhead about it, he said specifically that he was honestly confused why that was the case as he didn't consider it humiliating in the slightest. It's what he was, he knew that (at the time) I loved him and that the name was one of a certain intimacy.
The lesson? That the bulk of furries really have zero clue what legitimate BDSM is. Which is why so many of them never make it in the non-furry BDSM community. And why they're so mocked in general, from BDSM'ers. When you don't get something, and you try and ascribe a false belief to it, and then reinforce your mis-belief with lies, gossip and childish behavior it doesn't show you're mature, strong, or right. Further, it will certainly be great to hear final confirmation that by now, Fuckhead's views have gone 180 degrees and now he's almost certain to be holding me accountable to 'humiliating' him nonconsentually with such terms, simply because all his 'friends' have ego-stroked him into believing that what he said wasn't what he said, and what 'really' happened was what they want to have happened rather than any sort of reality.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
on 2008-May-19, Monday 12:34 pm (UTC)But yes, I know. I know. And it has taken me quite a long while to get to the point of simply holding as a rule that furries simply aren't worth the time of trying to hold solid, meaningful, interpersonal relationships with. Of couse there are exceptions on a one-for-one basis, and I enjoy them quite a lot. But overall, what you've said is dead on, and it's simply not worth the frustration, pain and hassle to deal with nowadays.